 |
| Balance 2011 |
The writing life is a strange and mercurial one. When the muse is talking there is no greater high. When that capricious lady clams up, well, life can be a bit sticky for a while. But like any compulsion, I can’t stop. Believe me. I have tried. So how do I live with the ups and downs that come with creating? The business of living any Life, a creative life included, comes down to balance.
Osmosis, The law of Conservation of Energy, Feng Shui, the idea of finding balance is elemental and omnipresent. But is balance attainable? Is a work/life balance a reachable goal or catching lightning in a bottle- the luck of the draw?
During his years as a paramedic, my husband, George, chanced to meet an elderly couple, married 75 years.
"Ah, new love," said the woman, her gnarled hand patting her husband's across the stretcher.
George smiled back. "What is your secret?" he asked. "Seventy-five years and you obviously still care very deeply for one another."
"I just got married," George told the couple. They smiled at him and then at each other.
"Ah, new love," said the woman, her gnarled hand patting her husband's across the stretcher.
George smiled back. "What is your secret?" he asked. "Seventy-five years and you obviously still care very deeply for one another."
Herb (that was the man's name, Herb) looked at his wife. A moment passed between them before he answered my husband. "The secret, son, is to never fall out of love at the same time. Someone has to fight to keep it together and someone has to be allowed to doubt, if for only a little while."
 |
 |
In other words, they took turns pushing the boulder uphill. Like a teeter-totter, husband and wife took the highs and lows, ups and downs, balancing one another through the years. They kept faith in a belief that what goes up must come down, and then go up again. They found their balance.
Balancing writing and life with four children and a marriage is a challenge. With the demands of both career and family pressing in from all sides, I am learning what it takes to balance my time with family with a compulsion to create.
Living with me isn’t easy in the best of circumstances and terrible (I suspect) in the worst; but I am a lucky girl. My family doesn’t seem to mind the moody irritated writer who sometimes goes by Mommy or Rebecca or Honey, or at least they take it in stride.
Ted Krever, author of Mindbenders understands what it is to live a writer’s life. In Part Two of our interview, Krever and I ruminate on the ideas of craft, routine and chasing that ellusive balance between an artist’s internal world and an external life of family, second jobs and social interaction. I hope you enjoy a glimpse into the inner workings of a writer's effort to live to write and write to live.
Part Two
On Writing: Life and Craft with Author Ted Krever
On Writing: Life and Craft with Author Ted Krever
RM: As a writer, we pull from our past experiences. What are some of yours you feel most influence your writing?
KREVER: David Morrell said at ThrillerFest that if you read his books, they were all chapters in his emotional autobiography. I'm paraphrasing but I think accurately.
RM: Yes, I remember that.
KREVER: So it's not so much pulling from the past for me. It's discovering, through writing the books, what I'm struggling with now. I know myself through my own writing; it's my best guide to my subconscious. And I work pretty hard to keep the subconscious instead of the conscious mind in control as much as possible. Of course, this is something Renn and Tauber deal with a lot in the book.
RM: When I was at ThrillerFest, I heard many different approaches to the work and craft of writing. Everyone seems to have their own process, their own ritual. What is your writing process? Do you have a set schedule?
KREVER: I write constantly, whenever I’m able. If I can pull out a book or pad or laptop, I’m writing. Some days, of course, staring at the blank screen in frustration is also considered writing. When I finish a book, I take a day off to pat myself on the back and start another. They don’t always get finished, but I am always working.
RM: Wow. A whole day? Isn’t that a little extravagant?
KREVER: I’m a hedonist, what can I say? When I have vacation days, like I will this weekend, that means more time to write! This is something I need to do. I’m a psychotic mess if I don’t deal with all these voices in my head. This is lesson #27 I leaned from Neil Young: the more you throw away, the more you have. If you write constantly and just keep putting it out, you keep finding more. If you’re cautious and only write a couple of sentences a day, it gets harder and harder. You can't let any piece of the process get too important.
RM: I think I know the feeling. The Innerworld, the places and people and situations inside your head need a way to get out. It creeps up on you and comes out in weird ways if I don’t get it out—like Alien dreams. But we are talking about you.
RM: So, don’t over-think the process of writing then, or the writing itself?
RM: I am frustrated when my typing doesn’t move as fast as my brain and allows that internal critic to voice an opinion. What do you do when your conscious mind gets in the way of your writing mind?
KREVER: I’m talking, really, about first draft, where I want the story to come from as unconscious, subconscious a place as I can. Let it come together in rough form and then I’ll refine later. Which is why first draft usually takes me five restarts to come together— very inefficient but useful in other ways. In every book I've ever written, I slogged to within thirty pages of the end of the first draft and I'd write a sentence without thinking and look at it and go "Oh, that's stupid" and then look a second time and it would explode on me. I've just told myself what the book is about. And then I have to go back and the second draft is writing the story so it leads to that line
RM: You surprise yourself. I do enjoy that part of the writing. When you read something from yesterday and think "Really? Where did that come from. I didn't know that!"
KREVER: Because you never know what the book is truly about until the end of the first draft. I'm just telling a story. But I think conscious is for later drafts. Unconscious for the first, for the story
RM: To paraphrase Stephen King: Write with the door closed and edit with it open.
KREVER: Because that's the level [the unconscious] the reader should react from. That is where character and story are the same thing.
RM: While in NYC, you accompanied me on a research field trip for my novel. How do you approach research for your novels and at what point do you begin the fact finding?
KREVER: Research for me is strictly answering the needs of the story. I don’t start researching until I need to know something or understand something and that’s all I do, though I’m open to whatever I find that’s interesting. I’m always open to being sidetracked because, again, it’s that element of being surprised. It only richens the mixture. And with a book like this, I researched a lot looking for limitations. What would be the limits of Renn’s mind power? What would get in the way? If you don’t have limits, you end up with Superman—all-powerful and essentially pretty boring.
RM: You mentioned thriller writer David Morrell a moment ago. There were many fantastic writers at Thrillerfest and all of them gave out advice of one sort or another. What is the best writing advice you have ever gotten?
KREVER: Joe Papaleo, my writing teacher, told me a novel is a gross form. Just throw everything on the page and cut back later. Unfortunately, he was dead by the time I learned how to cut back properly. That's the other hard part. Learning to edit yourself.
RM: What was the worst piece of advice?
KREVER: That's a tough question. I guess it was the implied concept that you can learn to write by studying literature. Literature is great but it has no relevance to the story that's inside you. You just have to let that out. Where it stands in terms of literature is for other people to figure out later.
You want the best piece of advice that I offer? Don't know whether I made it up or heard it from someone. C'mon...you've gotta give me permission so I'm not a pretentious little shit.
RM: Ok. Tell me.
KREVER: Write what hurts. If you write what hurts, you'll be into your subconscious. You'll be into what really matters to you, automatically. So you don't have to worry about what's at stake for the characters. There's something major at stake for you so there will be for them.
On Living a Writer’s Life
RM: How much does your writing life effect and or influence your living life, your relationships and day to day living?
KREVER: I have no life. I write and my relationships have to fit in with that.
I had no idea what a monk's life writing was until I committed myself to it. It takes everything you have.
RM: I think it takes a very special person to partner a writer. There is a general attitude that living with a writer is a tough business. Would you agree?
KREVER: Anyone who gets involved with me has to understand some part of me is always humming away in another dimension. Yes, I think that is hard to accept.
RM: I know that I become very frustrated trying to live in two worlds- the one in my head and the one where I have kids and bills and laundry. I never feel like I do either very well. Do you have any advice for writers trying to balance life and writing.
KREVER: I'm no role model. I gave up on life for ten years. I lived for writing and my son every other weekend. Now I'm trying to develop a balance; if I develop any success at it, I'll let you know.
RM: What do you think the ultimate spouse or significant other would be for a writer?
KREVER: Just understanding that our madness is our strength. That we can't function without this other world in our heads. If you can deal with that, then it's a normal relationship. But it's understanding that I'm in love with other women that I’ve made up and I am many different men and women all day long. And that my triumphs and failures almost all take place inside. That's a lot to ask.
Author Ted Krever and I discuss the business of publishing in part three of our interview
For more information about Ted Krever please visit www.tedkrever.com
